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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25497829">love is all that i feel</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedmachinery/pseuds/icedmachinery'>icedmachinery</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/icemachine/pseuds/icemachine'>icemachine</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Doom Patrol (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen, Religious Imagery &amp; Symbolism</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 04:02:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>609</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25497829</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedmachinery/pseuds/icedmachinery, https://archiveofourown.org/users/icemachine/pseuds/icemachine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dex left the hospital. It was a miracle, and Keeg does believe in miracles; a miracle brought them here, to this home. Larry’s grandson is not here, but Larry moves his body shuffleslow to the hospital chapel and moves onto his knees.</p><p>What can God do for Larry that Keeg can't?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Keeg Bovo &amp; Larry Trainor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>love is all that i feel</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The concept was used to shame him, long ago, decades ago, when Larry’s frame was shorter and held increased fragility, during times that should have held innocence in tremoring fingertips instead of agony in stability; </span>
  <em>
    <span>you have to attend, you have to pray every night and thank the Lord before eating, and above all, the foundation of the structure—-you must repent. When you sin, you ask for forgiveness, and God may forgive, but he quite certainly does not forget.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Keeg repents to no one.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Falsely, Keeg repents to Larry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>From a glance into the religious aspects of Larry’s mind, Keeg cannot imagine worshiping something so fleeting—-ultimately they know that the concept of God is temporary, that the universe had formed itself with its own humanoid hands. They fall to worship what they can see, what is tangible—</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Larry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Larry is the only tangible thing in this world, now. Even before the birth of Larry Trainor, even millennia ago, even in the beginning and formation of the galaxies and planets that they reign over—-every event in the past has lead up to their merge, and Larry is a constant, much like how the vast emptiness of space is a constant; even when the Earth ends, the rest of the universe will continue on, and Larry will continue spinning as the celestial body that Keeg revolves around, builds their existence around, needs - </span>
  <em>
    <span>craves - </span>
  </em>
  <span>for survival.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They used the concept of God against him. Religion is supposed to bring comfort, but it gifted Larry with only abrasions and bruises to the flesh. In his mind: </span>
  <em>
    <span>abomination. Sinner.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dex left the hospital. It was a miracle, and Keeg does believe in miracles; a miracle </span>
  <em>
    <span>brought them here, </span>
  </em>
  <span>to this home. Larry’s grandson is not here, but Larry moves his body shuffleslow to the hospital chapel and moves onto his knees — </span>
  <em>
    <span>hm, </span>
  </em>
  <span>in his mind, </span>
  <em>
    <span>this is the pure position. The right way.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know,” he says, out loud but silent, “that I’m not exactly your favorite. I know that I probably disappoint you on a daily basis. But… I need help. I need some guidance.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Keeg cannot comprehend it—-why would he pray to a being that only brought him pain? Why would he turn to this fleeting, inanimate mist for help, as opposed to the one person of similar holiness that knows Larry so intimately that they live within him?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>What can God do for Larry that Keeg cannot?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what to do,” he continues. “My family hates me. I missed so many years with them… </span>
  <em>
    <span>decades… </span>
  </em>
  <span>and I hate myself for it. And this thing, inside me—” </span>
  <em>
    <span>if Keeg could fluster—</span>
  </em>
  <span> “I don’t know why it wants to stay with me. I’m not good in any way. All I’ve ever done is hurt it. I hurt everyone I care about and I can’t seem to stop.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The greater implication: that Larry cares for them. Larry is so </span>
  <em>
    <span>loved---</span>
  </em>
  <span>by Keeg, by Rita, by Jane and Cliff and Vic and Flex and Keeg and Keeg and—-but he is incapable of believing that he deserves it. In Keeg’s perception, Larry deserves everything; their body may be luminescent but </span>
  <em>
    <span>Larry </span>
  </em>
  <span>is the ultimate light, Larry just might be the truth of the universe and all that is—</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Is this worship?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Is this what it’s like to believe in something higher?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Is Larry their concept of religion?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for healing Dex. I’m grateful. I just… if you could… make it clear. Tell me, somehow, what I’m supposed to do.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Larry stands up and begins his journey back to the manor. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Home.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Thank you, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Keeg thinks, </span>
  <em>
    <span>for healing </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>me. </em>
  </b>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>when the devotion hits<br/>kudos+comments majorly appreciated<br/>title: radioactive by marina</p></blockquote></div></div>
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